This month’s high-powered read for the Business & Growth Book Club was Brotopia: Breaking Up the Boys’ Club of Silicon Valley, by Emily Change.
My initial response? Smart. Deep. Disappointing.
Let me explain…
I grew up knowing the cards were stacked against me. When I was a little girl, I heard more times than I can count, “You’re just a girl!”
It was meant as the ultimate put-down. A slap in the face for a girl who didn’t understand her place, or if she did, didn’t know she was overstepping.
My parents (and most boys) were perpetually angry with me because I wouldn’t let the boys win. Ironically I was also taught that if something was worth doing, it was worth doing right. And my takeaway from that double-talk was a firm belief that if the boys wanted to win, they needed to keep up.
Since those long-ago days, I’ve watched the young women coming behind me. They’re no longer told they’re just a girl. They’re allowed to win at sports. And if they beat a boy, they don’t get into trouble.
They’re ambitious. They’re getting higher degrees. They’re running businesses and being hired to the C-Suite. And I admire them for it.
This is the context I bring to my reading of Brotopia. And it’s why this book disappoints me.
My Reaction
I honestly thought the world was progressing. I should have known better.
I find I see things in my gut before I understand them in my mind. This is obviously one of those areas, because Brotopia pulled back the curtains on the reality of the bro culture, not just in Silicon Valley or tech but in business as a whole.
It turns out I’m still just a girl. It’s not something people feel free to say anymore, but it’s true nonetheless.
What that means is most of the talk about diversity and inclusiveness we see in business today is rhetoric. Little more.
Let’s look at just a few of the stats that Chang has pulled together for us.
1984.
That was the high point for the percentage of women earning degrees in computer science. That year, they earned 40% of computer science degrees. By 2017, that percentage had been slashed in half.
You need to read Chang’s recounting of the history of tech. It’s fascinating to know how it became the boys’ club it is today.
And as a side note, two years prior to that peak, I met with two economics professors about minoring in their program. They laughed me out of the room. So yeah, it’s not just tech that women have been excluded from. It’s many of the advanced programs that men consider their exclusive domain.
Companies with 30% female leadership are 6% more profitable.
You’d think that’s reason enough to dissolve the boys’ club. Yet the majority of companies edge out intelligent women with impressive resumes and pedigrees. Their excuse? Women don’t have the right background.
Read the book to see how men are routinely given opportunities to prove themselves, and women are subtly (or openly) driven off.
Women-owned business isn’t a solution.
Even if a woman decides she’ll create a company where she can thrive, she’s going to run up against the bro culture.
Women are denied funding more often than men, and if they do get it, they’re given 25% of the money requested. Men, on the other hand, are typically given 52% of their ask.
Is it any wonder that at the 12-year point, half of women exit tech?
Brotopia Review
Brotopia is incredibly well researched and reported. It’s packed with real-life stories, interviews, and statistics.
But it’s not a fun read — especially if you’re a woman, and especially if you’ve experienced the issues she brings up.
The more I read, the more I found myself getting angry. Memories kept flashing through my mind:
Those times when I was given a good-but-demeaning review, the facts skewed to suggest my work was somehow falling short, despite me blowing every stretch goal out of the water…
Times when men took credit for my results…
Times when I was overlooked for promotions and raises for flimsy reasons that don’t hold up.
Looking back, I see these moments in light of Brotopia, and I understand. The world hasn’t changed as much as I had hoped.
You’re getting my honest reaction to Brotopia today. It’s colored by the insights and reinterpretations of decades of my own experiences. But that shouldn’t take anything away from this book.
Brotopia is a must-read for every professional — sis and bro alike. While it doesn’t give us a step-by-step solution to the boys’ club (the subtitle is deceiving), it does help us understand it and recognize it for what it is.
Ultimately, if we’re going to bring change, we need this level of understanding.
We need to open the doors to everyone who isn’t a straight white man. We need equal opportunities and fair treatment. We need to respect the vision and intelligence of professional women.
Chang quoted one woman as saying, “No matter how hard you lean in, you’re not going anywhere if the door is nailed shut.”
And she’s right.
So let’s stop pretending that things have changed. Let’s educate ourselves and work together to create a better world for us all.
